Spankings for everybody!

Me: I’m going to spank you. Devon: Why?

Me: You're such a dude. We have an empty laundry basket in the closet and an empty laundry bag 3 feet away from it. Where are all your dirty clothes? On the floor between them.

Devon: Well, I got the right room.

Me: That’s like me shitting in the shower and saying it’s OK because I got the right room.

Devon: Who shits in the shower? Your metaphor is weird.

Me: It’s a simile.

Devon: You’re right. But a metaphor is like a simile.