My hair feathered just writing this

There will never be a decade as awesome as the '80s. I know what you're thinking. Shut up. You know I'm right: You just won't admit it. It's my job to bring you to the light with the top five most bodacious, rad things from the '80s.

WHT WHT was a subscription movie service in New York City, kind of like HBO's retarded cousin. Having WHT made us the shit. With WHT, you didn't just have 13 channels. You had FOURTEEN!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjB4OaTWGTs

My Little Pony My Little Pony is so cool that people who enjoyed it in the '80s have created porn of it in the 21st century. It's THAT cool. This is mostly safe for work unless your boss is a harsh hoser.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrdiKoZLPkU

Boomboxes

Boomboxes were introduced in the mid-'70s but came into their own in the '80s. The modern trend is to make things small, but the '80s were not a decade for subtlety. You wanted everyone to know that you spent a lot of money on your stereo and that you listened to AC/DC. It wasn't really music if it didn't rattle your teeth.

Boomboxes "Let me put my love into you, babe. Let me put my love on the line. Let me put my love into you, babe. Let me cut your cake with my knife." Remember these lyrics when people bitch about how stupid modern music is.

Ouija Boards

These were awesome for convincing pre-teen girls that Parker Brothers had opened a portal to the afterlife. Funny how the dead always said exactly what I expected them to say.

Ouija Board

Scratch and Sniff Stickers

You scratched them. Then you sniffed them. Life was pretty simple then. These stickers smelled vaguely like something fruity or chocolate-y. My cousin took me to a store where, if they sold anything else, I don't remember, because the stickers had my undivided attention.

Scratch and Sniff stickers This shit's cool. Trust me:

They don't make pens like they used to.